Being We: 'The Rest of Us'

Once again… Once again we are attacked. Once again we are shattered and once again

we point our fingers. But, hold on, before we drop that finger, we should seek answers,

answers to these continuing hostility and violence. Not from the government, but from,

where the other three fingers are pointing towards. Not surprisingly, they are pointed at

ourselves!

Well, we all know, there are a few fanatics in our society, in every community, and these

miscreants are responsible for creating communal tension in India. In their twisted minds,

killing innocent people is the way to take revenge. But the rest of us, the majority, we

do not believe in violence, we do not approve of such violent acts. We believe in

secularism and communal harmony. So these terrorists should be caught, punished, and

if possible tortured and hanged. This would serve as a deterrent to future criminals and

hence would prevent further such attacks. We will all live in peace and harmony!!!

How easy, and yet how untrue? Have we ever wondered from where these miscreants

come from? Aren’t they a product of our own society and as such a part of our very own

society. How pathological should the society be to create such criminal minds? Considering

that society is nothing but you and me, this implies there is something rotting deep inside.

So while we continue blaming the few, let us try and understand this rot.

I believe, if not hatred, at least a dislike or discomfort or mistrust is running through

the majority of Indians towards ‘the other community’. 

It doesn't matter whether I am a Hindu or a Muslim, a Dalit or a Brahmin.
What I am not constitutes 'the other community'. 

We hate to accept it, and we try to suppress it,
but if we ask a few questions we should get the answers. How many

of us would prefer to live in a locality dominated by ‘the other community’ residents?

How many of us are comfortable when we are standing amidst a group of ‘the

other community’? How many ‘the other community’ friends do each one of us have?

Don’t we find the mistrust, dislike, and discomfort running through all of us?
More important is why we find this mistrust, dislike and discomfort?

Answer might lie in the way we derive our identity. Our identities are derived, developed

and consolidated on the basis of similarities and resemblances, often inflated and often

forged. We are taught to live, love and respect these similarities, while relationships

with ‘the others’ are to be temporary, and on need basis. We fail to respect reciprocity

and mutuality, but worship the identity of similarity.
But it is not the case that similarities lead to identity creation,
often it is the identities that enforce and maintain these similarities
Thus I am a Hindu, Nair, Keralite and hence different from this Tamil Brahmin or that Bihari Musalman.
Now, why am I different from them?
Because our identities are different. That tells us that we should not have similarities.

And we would have thought identities originate from similarities, and not the other way around! 

Thus even when I have more in common with that Bihari Musalman, 

than my Hindu Nair Keralite friend, my identity refuses to accept that and

infuses in me that he is different. 

The identities that were once formed on the basis of similarities and differences 

are now enforcing those similarities and differences.

Let us probe a little more about 'the identity' which has had a definite impact on the history of

modern India, the identity of being a Hindu or a Muslim. Our heroes of national

movement considered Hindu-Muslim unity as the most important ideal to be upheld.And like

in the case of most of their vision, we did not fail to uphold this ideal. But we made sure it remained

an ideal, even better, as a mere idea and never as the way of life. Like our other ideals and ideas,

compassion, patriotism, selflesness, whoever brings these ideals to action are considered

as a hero, and we all hail his heroic act. Thus what should have been a simple, normal

way of life, gets elevated to the higher planes of idea, ideals and ideologies. Like in the movie, “Hey Ram”,

when Kamalhasan saves a Hindu life, it is a normal act, but when he saves a Muslim life,

knowing fully that he is a Muslim, it becomes a heroic act. 

Transferring the burden of doing good to the heroes and blaming the villains for doing bad, we, the rest of us, rest...

Well, most of us, as secular as we are, must have a few ‘the other community’ friends.

But is that enough? Often we would justify the friendship by saying he is not like other members of his community. He is good you know.. Despite being from 'the other community'.
He does not hold the sentiments/opinions that the majority of his community holds. 

He is an exception. He being good, is your friend, others being bad are not your friends. 

I am reminded of what Spinoza had written once, 

“You do not like it because it is good, but, it is good because you like it.”

Coming back to those few miscreants, who are hell-bound to create havoc in our society,

aren't they only expressing the collective feeling that we have for each other? 
Don’t you think they are the children of the atmosphere of mistrust that we have created? 

No, I am not telling that we, the rest of us, accept or approve of this violence. 

Rather, I believe, knowingly or unknowingly the suppressed dislike, discomfort and mistrust that

we hold for each other is being converted and channelized to hatred and hatred alone by a few.
So can we blame the few, and absolve ourselves of our responsibilities? 

Before we let our hands search the coziness of our jeans pockets, we need to

answer those three questions that the three fingers are asking:

Have I in slightest possible way contributed to all these hatred and violence?

Could I have done anything, anything at all which would have prevented such hostilities?

Can I in any possible way contribute towards a better and peaceful society?